When You're With Me
by chichirichick
Summary: There are so many blanks to Stein and Marie's relationship, the history of how they went from an unspoken, presumed one-sided love to parents. It all had to happen somehow, so it might as well start with a desert trek in search of Justin Law.


Some random reviewer on another fic mentioned wanted to see some Marie/Stein, and while I couldn't fit it in the other fic, it definitely started my mind churning on how to fill in the blanks of Marie's pregnancy, starting with their search for Justin. So, here goes. Please give me your opinions since I'm working on Stein and Marie's personalities.

* * *

The first night we camped, I put my sleeping bag on the other side of the campfire. Of course, my mind wouldn't shut up with common sense commentary: _He's the closest thing to a best friend that you have. He didn't kill BJ. He needs you_. I guess I wanted to be stubborn in the same way that he could be clueless, perfectly exemplified by the fact that he still had nothing to say about my decision to accompany him out on this manhunt for Justin Law.

That night the moaning from his madness-induced nightmares kept me awake, a fitting karmic punishment. During the day he was sluggish, his jaw firmly set for the entirety of the journey from point A to point B in our search.

It only took the second night for me to lay next to him. As expected he said absolutely nothing about the change, just took off his glasses before resting on his back, his eyes staring vacantly up at the stars. "Franken…" any other words cluttered on my tongue.

"Marie." He was motionless beside his lips uttering my name, eyes still glued somewhere far off.

I sighed and while my lips were frozen my hand did what it could, crawling between us until it rested on his chest.

He echoed me before moving his own hand, placing it on top of mine, pressing my fingers into the fabric of his shirt. "I don't believe the healing wavelength is necessary right now."

"It's not for _that_," the annoyance in my voice even grated on my nerves and I tried to scrape it from my tongue before the next sentence. "I want to know you're alright."

"And a hand does that?" His eyes drifted to our contact before playing with my fingers, lifting each as if to examine them.

"Franken," I sighed.

"Marie." A devious little smile parted his lips before he rested his hand back over mine. "I'm fine."

"Liar," I grumbled back, doing nothing but feeding that smile on his lips.

"What would you like me to say so that we can both get to sleep at a decent hour?" I tried to make a fist, ready to put a hole through his chest rather than smooth it anymore but his fingers tensed over mine, his smile fading away at the corners. "You're with me, Marie. I'm fine when you're with me."

I wished he was looking at me when he said that but those foggy green eyes were still focused somewhere I wasn't. "Was that so hard to say?" My petulant annoyance was back, another trait that reminded me that I couldn't keep a man, especially if that was my favorite tone with the one that I loved beyond just about everyone else.

"Excruciating." He was smiling, probably to vex me again, but it wavered and I caught his eyes dart over at me before moving back into the abyss. "Now, go to sleep, Marie."

I hesitated, wanting to question again but I whispered, "Good night." As I closed my eyes his hand flexed over mine a little tighter, reminding me that I couldn't have it back.

* * *

Day three and my frustration level was through the roof. The only consolation was that today Stein was just himself, no tensely taut teeth, no absolute silence, just the soft melody of his interjections to my almost non-stop chatter. It helped to drift us through the day, another one wasted sifting sand in search of the man who murdered BJ. That often became a name that multiplied in my sentences along the way, the main topic of the revenge that was raging in my mind.

Stein squeezed in his analytical statement of the obvious, "You miss him."

"Don't you?" I hated how he never slowed, rarely gave me his eyes.

"I didn't love him," Stein offered back, a tight grin pulling at his lips.

"I _cared_ about him," I stuttered out. "I never said I loved him, Stein." That didn't get me another word out of him and I felt more uneven than my feet sinking in the sand. "I only ever loved one person." There was a brick in my stomach, swallowed with the words '_you, you idiot' _that wouldn't leave my mouth.

"I certainly don't believe that," he smirked. "I seem to remember at least three or four times-"

"Franken Stein, do not finish that sentence!" I sent a punch into his shoulder, receiving just a push of air from his mouth in reply. "If I said I love one person, I love one person."

"What happened to the past tense?" An eyebrow raised over his glasses frame.

This was where my lips button shut, the roll of my eyes and crossing of my arms the only messages to him. There was no argument from me that I was an _idiot_ in every sense of the word, maybe even a coward since what kept me from unearthing feelings that I'd carried along from our teens into our adult life? I was supposed to be an adult! We _were_ adults, and it wasn't just some school girl crush anymore it was a solidified adoration that had settled in a stable home in my heart.

It was the cling, that kiss of death in all of my relationships that kept me from it. With this secret positioned so carefully between us, I could love him, be near him and take care of him without overwhelming. There was still a distance between us that kept him from getting tired of me, overpowered by the love that I would drown him in if he only knew. That kept resounding in my brain even as the day dragged into the night and I laid down next to him, my hand falling back into the spot from the night before. I just wanted to close my eyes, to force my mind into the silence I hadn't had all day.

"Marie."

His voice shocked my eyes back open, seeing his eyes not focused out into the darkness but wholly on my face, his head even turned towards me. "Yes?"

"Are you alright?" I knew he was squinting because he couldn't exactly see right without his glasses but it felt like he was trying to see right through me.

Between his eyes and the question, my mouth went dry, offering nothing more than a single word. "What?"

He turned his face to the sky again, making me ache from the lost connection. "You were quiet."

We were indefinitely trapped in this desert until we found Justin which meant there was no escape from Stein, no escape from myself, and there wasn't even a guarantee that when we found Justin it would actually go in our favor. Even before I left, when I agreed to go off with Stein in the first place, I'd come to grips with the idea that my life would most likely never be the same again. So maybe I wouldn't even have the opportunity to drown him, the time we had left only maybe registering as a splash.

"I was thinking too much." My fingers clenched a little tighter in his shirt, kneading the skin underneath.

"About?"

I used the hand sunk into his chest to steady myself as I brought myself up on my other elbow. I was leaning over him, forcing his eyes to stare into mine. "I'm afraid."

He hesitated until his eyes searched my face, the words slowly slipping off his tongue. "That isn't like you."

"And you know that because you know almost everything about me, don't you, Franken?"

His eyebrows furrowed, "Marie-"

It wasn't possible to let him answer or I would have lost my nerve. I leaned in, capturing the tail-end of my name from his lips with my own. No one would ever describe any piece of Stein as tender but, oh, Death, his lips were. I've kissed more than enough men (I could hear Azusa making a comment here as it crossed my mind) but this was euphoric, a first kiss that trounced even those romance novel descriptions. I was sure of the need radiating off of him, the way his lips met what I gave him with a rough intensity.

But his hand detached from mine and cupped and tightened at my neck, lifting me away. "Marie, please."

I knocked my fist uselessly into his chest. "Please, what?"

"Please don't."

My eyes fluttered open as my gut tightened with a crushing shame until my eyes met his. What was it that was glowing behind that dim jade? He was desperately trying to hide it, to swallow it down with the taste of my kiss but even with all his strength on the battlefield, it was obvious he barely had any over his own heart. Whatever it was, he wasn't ready to let it go and as I lowered myself back to my side of our makeshift bed I decided I wasn't ready to push him. But there was a crack threatening in both of us now, a dam that wouldn't stay true for long.


End file.
